1. If you were a spice, you’d be flour.
2. You’re so ugly, you couldn’t even arouse suspicion.
3. You’re like the first slice of bread in the packet, everyone touches you but no one wants you.
4. You’re as sharp as a rubber ball.
5. Me: Singing along to Fleetwood Mac.
Friend: Who sings this?
Me: Fleetwood Mac.
Friend: Yeah, let’s keep it that way…
6. If you had a brain cell, it would die of loneliness.
7. Here, I gift you this plant to carry around with you. To make up for all the oxygen you waste.
8. You look like a video game…
This is only a snippet of a self Improvement article written by January Nelson
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